motherFUSKER!

visual basics had always been like BAD. but today, it was ACCEPTIONALLY TERRIBLE.
no one was in the FREAKING mood man! (well, at least paris, sam, rachelle and i)

we went down to the bookshop during breakout one and guess what? we went GAGA over GLITTER. we bought ONE miserable pink tube in the end because we wanted to decorate our lappies :)



*HADIF had volunteered to decorate SHEENA'S and my hand!*


href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger/158/1492/1600/135351/Image122.jpg">
*and I DREW SAMANTHA a PRETTY HEART :)*



*and I had ATTEMPTED to STICKMAN and STICKWOMAN on my lappy, but it came out in the end*


we were so RESTLESS and since we decided that we would NEVER understand what was going on today, PARIS, SAM, RACH and I decided to CAM-WHORE. we ended up dancing and singing around like PARIS HILTON and NICOLE RICHIE in SIMPLE LIFE. totally hilarious.
we were just roaming around school and bitching about eberything and anything.

ohhh...and i made friends (i think) with this guy next door. we were going to the toilet when i saw him drawing on the window of his class. this was what i said:

"hi sexy, you look hot. mr cap guy, since you are like my neighbour and the semster is coming to an end, we should like get to know each other. so, what's your name?"

arrww well, at least i said something like that. HAHAHA!
his name is MALCOM. (and i do think he is cute :D)

i've been sneezing the whole day. think it's one of those stupid days where my SIGHNESS is kicking in. i've taken TWO COLD PANADOLS that i bought from the bookshop already. it ISN'T WORKING!!!

sam teo went home. BLEAH x(

trippin'

how did i get myself into this?
i keep thinking. i dont get it.


i think i really got you. i dont want you to feel so hurt mat.
i mean i dont remember saying anything nasty. i never said nothing would happen.
i am unsure, i am fearful.
that's all.
i dont know how long it would take to get over it sweets.
but what more can i do?
only time will tell?


sam, you've made me real mad and really happy.
goodnes gracious, it's funny la..i mean everything.
you know what sam?
you've learnt a very important lesson from me. treasure it.
CAM-WHORING :) like totally...geezz...


i said i would ignore you, ok, i mean like STAY AWAY.
but here you are again, popping into my life once more.
i wonder what you want.
i fear you D***O.
i dont want history to repeat.
you want us to try again.
i guess i dare not to.
im sorry although i said ok.
i will try but it's really gonna be hard.
(im hoping you'll read this and understand)


southpark is sick again.
blaahh!!!
why are you always down with the nasty flu.
haha.
poor thing.
anyway, i hope all your hardwork will pay off darl.


ive got a new job :))
im gonna be coaching kids in swimming.
YAYYY!!!
like MORE TIME to myself and not to mention KAA-CHIINGG! in a shorter time as compared to what i am doing now.
i'll still do lifeguarding though.


updates on the TOTAL SEXAY (according to me) pictures of the COOLEST w16j:

screwed up thoughts and aching mucles.

it's been a while and i still think of it.
my past haunts me still now and then and many a times, i wished i hadn't did certain things that i had done.
but what am i to do now but to move on?
i learn and i try hard never to repeat my mistakes again.
i want that one thing that i may never get again.
i sit in silence and stare into blank space.


it's funny how people can be so cunning. i never knew i would one day meet such a person whom i treated and trusted as a friend to turn around and stab me in the back. how could you say things that werent true? how could you go around spreading something so mean? one that had caused me to loose something so dear. what is your motive? i really dont know. i do know that you've won and i've lost though. i got ditched honey, he didnt want me no more. i hope you are happy now.


i wanna force all aching musles in me out.
i think i might just curl up and die.

music: n'sync: this i promise you/ i drive myself crazy

it's a mid-week, wednesday.
RP had a two day break because of OPEN HOUSE. (meaning, we had a long weekend)


yesterday, (TUESDAY, 16/01/2007) i was at CHANGI AIRPORT from 4AM all the way till 10AM.

j u s t i n . z flew off to WASHINGTON to study for SIX MONTHS.
DADDY flew off to VIETNAM to follow LKY to do a REPORT. he'll be back on SATURDAY.

i guess the whole thing about being BROTHERLESS for six months hasnt exactly kicked into me yet. SIGH! it was really weird and i guess to me, it had happened all too fast.

LICIA had stayed over. COLIN had came over to pick MY MOM, LISH, MY BROTHER and I up to the AIRPORT. my dad stayed home to sleep since he had a flight later on that same morning. we all had hot drinks since we were all freezing. after my brothe rhad checked in, a whole group of his guy friends turned up. like WOW. i mean really it's cool that ONLY ONE person is flying off and A WHOLE GROUP turns up. thinking back, i im proud of my brother. well, at least it goes to show that he's rather well-liked. anyway, the emotional part came when we swere all satdning outside the departure gates and THE GUYS all lined up for a handshake (totally hilarious for awhile). my brother leaning down to hug my mom and THEN ME :). obviously, he kept the last one for LISH. watching them hug made me tear a lil'. everyone could see that they were resisting leaving each other. i could see her teary eyes and she was trying to hide. so anyway, he bid his final goodbye and quickly went in. i guess my brother wanted to leave quickly too. knowing him, i guess he didnt want us to see him cry.

I MISS MY BROTHER already.
i just got an email from him though.


anyway, these were some of the photos i took while having a FAREWELL DINNER at STAITS KITCHEN at HYATT HOTEL on SUNDAY.

the night we stayed till 2 in the morn' just for small talks and coffee in town.

SAM AND I.



DEBBIE AND KEVIN :))

music: paris hilton: nothing in this world

im in school.
math module.
it's breakout two and timecheck, it's 12:39pm

i just went down to with rudolf, samantha, rachelle and sheena to grab some stuff.
i bought a bottle of mineral water, hair clips (cos' i was dumb enoughto leave my rubberband and hair clips in the school's shower on monday after training), peppermint green tea (my itchy mouth insisted that i needed something minty) and that that..what's it called?....plaster thingie for muscle aches and etc.

and so here i am now all plastered and feeling hella SHIOK. oh did i mention? mathew that silly brat said that HE HAD panadol and said that he would pass it to me at the AGORA. guess what? i ended up bumping into him on the way to the BOOKSHOP and he HAD ACTUALLY BOUGHT panadol for me. bleah. haa...good thing he was smart enough not to get the PINK MENSTRUAL PILLS. wahahaha.

sam's sleeping in class (what's new) and im feeling bored. aarrgghh!!! im looking around the classroom. everyone's doing their own thing. no one's actually doing WORK. muahahahaha!

im smsing kenny chong. i think the fella's gone kuku. haha. he's talking about him being dead and desending to hell still. bahh...that southpark.

hadif's back and he's peeking at me blogging :D

mathew's asking me to go for a walk. ERRR...i know the school's really green but erm...a walk?? hahahahaha. silly!!!!!!!!!!!

okie..im gonna make myself look like im doing work just to make myself sastified.

ciao people!!!!!!!!!!

I WANNA HAVE A SMASHING 2007!

a new year = a refreshing start


NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS:
1) do well in school (DUHH...)
2) reach my peak in lifesaving (COMMONWEALTH NEXT YEAR?)
3) do a major performace in drama
4) read more
5) manage my KA-CHING$$$
6) spend more time with my besties, silly boy and family (PLUS MERMAID)
7) work work work
8) handle alocoholic drinks (LOL)


i feel kinda like im getting old. SIGH!
another year means i get a year older.
arrww well...at least im turning 18 :)
no one's gonna nag at me and say i am an underage drinker.
im gonna start year two in RP soon and i can hardly wait.


dawn says that 2006 had been a bad year for us. love mess and all.
she tells me that this year would be better. she promises me.
i hope so my babe.

I LOVE YOU ALL WHO MADE A DIFFERENCE IN MY LIFE.

stingray's BBQ team photos.

new faces and as well as old and familiar ones.
great time we had catching up.
i stayed over and we were all squeezing for the bed.
i've missed you guys.

that FINE FINE day.

i met DAWN KHOO only ONCE this hols. WTH.
and we went to VIVO CITY.
and we SHOPPED and I BOUGHT MANY MANY things while that stupid girl insist that she couldnt find anything.
i think ive got a new fetish for ZARA & TOPSHOP :)
I MISS DAWN KHOO!

sentosa's christmas party. 26/12/2006

i had no freaking intention to consume any drop of alcohol that night.
honestly, i wanted to be sober and up partying.

i met jess, august, jason, dex, adrian and twang at dhoby ghaut where august, jason and adrian were playing arcade where jess, dex and i were bored and dying from the horrible noise while waiting for twang to arrive. anyway, we left for sentosa altogether.

dex got a pretty red nike dunks for twang. i like it :)

it was raining. cold and wet party.

we arrived late. the people were eating, BUT, we were in time for the alcohol.
shheesshh...

and there i was happily jeering mark on to down more black labor with twang and sucking on my candy cane. the next thing i knew, there was a so called "lucky draw". i ended up having to down like 1/3 cup full of like what...70% of ABSINTHE totally NEAT, with no popping whatsoever. F***ED UP CAN.

they had to take a freaking photo of me some more. LOL. WTH.

the next thing i knew, i was sucking on ice and thankfully, harry ran down to get me a bottle of water.

i continued to suck on candy canes and insisting that i was ok when i already knew that i was getting HIGH and insanely RED. hmm...

but really, i was ok (to a certain extent). i was just HIGH ENOUGH to STILL THINK can.

but no, everyone thought i wasnt ok. WTH. I REMEMBERED EVERYTHING I FREAKING SAID TO EVERYONE lor. i remembered the LAP DANCES, DEXTER SHAKING ME BY THE SHOULDERS AND TELLING ME THAT I AM GOING TO STAY OVER and the me walking back to the office and teling jen that i wanted to puke but i couldnt and in the end, i still ended up running to the bushes to puke my arse off.

they then insisted that i cabbed home with ben chan, royston and seb. and i did. three hunks as my bodyguards. WHY NOT :))

HAHAHA!

it's funny how i was high and i could still insist that i talk to sam that night.

steph said something about loving to take photos with me when i am high.
WHY AR???

tears.

you finally called.

"maybe we weren't meant to be."

it hurt baby and im tearing.
like you would believe me.
no matter how much i say, i guess to you it'a all just a load of rubbish.

why in the fucking world does love actually exsist?
you brought me in and you ended it.
and now, im just left alone, helpless, for i never quite understood anything.
you wont say, and no one else knows, so what am i to do?

how can i pretend that nothing happen?
because it did.
three months meant so much, i saw a freaking future.
you crushed it.

you dont believd me no more.

i cannot say how much it fucking hurts.
sometimes i go crazy.

sometimes i force myself to believe that things will get better when i know it wont.

so much for my happy endings..i know you are happy now without me.

i am probably deem as the bad guy.

if i cry you a river, would you believe me?

our memories makesme smile still.

music: jojo: too little too late

woke up at 9.45am
was supposed to head down to sentosa to help grazzie with some party stuff.
but i figured that it was kinda ridiculous to go down so late because i was meeting dawn at noon at vivo city.
so i stayed home and made a huge sandwich in which i shared a portion with mermaid. (haha! she was 'oggling' at it! i couldnt resist her puppy eyes.)
so now here i am, thinking of corny but yet sincere messages for the boys and girls or sentosa.
mermaid has decided to seek shelter and make herself cosy. im alone.


i'll be going for a chalet tonight. more pictures!

on rainy days...

it had been a boring monday.
i swear i was seriously bumming around.

i was supposed to do christmas shopping with stanley, but that dumbass suddenly called to say that he had some work to rush and would meet me in the evening instead.
since i was rather moodless plus restless, i decided that i would tag along with kim to her workplace at marina square, anderson's to slack and just 'chill' (if you would call it).

I had went to trim my fringe in the early afternoon with her simply because I decided I had nothing much to do. Oh well...i had wanted to go for a straight cut but then..damn...i totally dont know what happened. anyway, i look the same. bleah!
then we walked around heartland mall simply because it was still early and we had to kill time. we ended up making identical necklaces which cost the same price for each other and deemed it as a christmas. goodness!





at her workplace, i had a piece of strawberry cake and i had specially bought cleo from guardian along the way so i could read it at the cafe ans try to kill time. LOL. all because stanley was late. sigh!






after two freaking hours, stanGAY finally arrived. goodness, he had some waffle ice cream thingie before we decided that we didnt wanna have suppser with kim because that would mean we had to wait till 10pm. so we left and headed to wheelock place because i had to send my fuggly useless cellie to the nokia care centre. shitty.

we then walked in the pouring rain to pacific plaza becuase stanley's watch decided that it was the perfect timing to give up on him. so we had to go to fossil to mend his dumb watch. guess what, it was CLOSED when we got there. ARRWW MAN....

it was a lousy day la. the stupid rain ruined it all. not to mention, dampened my mood. i thought of kenny on the train ride back. all the way. sigh sigh!

OFF.

monday.
18/12/2006.

it's my off day. or rather, i couldn't get a shift to work. maybe i should try looking for another lifeguarding job. haha.

anyway, dawn's got a match in rp in the evening. i've got gym training with my wallies. so, i guess i'll meet her later :)

jesse's results are coming out today. i wish her all the best.

sam's at work, i have no clue about kevin.

dexter's out shopping alone in JB i think.

gladys isn't free and i don't know why.

kim has work in the evening but she has agreed to go out with me :) thanks babe.

stanley isn't gonna wake up anytime soon, so i'm contemplating if i should still go out with him. HEH.



he said something that really hit me hard last night when we spoke on the phone. i guess his life is much better without me. i am hopeless. baby baby...i wanna sit under the stars with you and just kiss you ever so gently on the cheek. will it ever happen again?



its 11:17am and i'm listening to the soundtrack of 'step up' while waiting for kim.

shattered and torn.

you've been clubbing and drinking hell lot baby.
i've got no more say.




so sam's back and i've been out with him.
i caught 'THE HOLIDAY' with sam and kevin koo on thursday night after work.
the show was good, but i kinda fell asleep a little. lol. i couldn't help it, i was freaking tired!



my handphone has officailly given up on me and is giving me a hell lot of trouble now. dang! i've got to send it for repair. then again, my parents wanted me to do so. i so want a PDA cellie!




anyway, i had worked late shift today. bloody hell, it was hot! thanks to the stupid wind, it blew away the rain. shheesshh..and i was at zone 10 can! meaning...no freaking proper shade at all! then junjie, that uncle (HAHA!), decided that he wanted to torture my already dumb lousy cell phone.