wed, 25th sept 08

mama mia, here i go again
my, my how can i resist ya

mama mia, does it show again
my, my just how much i missed ya

yes, i've been brokenhearted
ohh, since the day we parted
why, why, did i ever let you go

mama mia, now i really know
my, my, i should have never let you go



now that the lifesaving season is pretty much over, i'd say that my performance was alright but as usualy, could have been a whole lot better. but least for once, i dare say that this time around, i enterted the competition with a better mental state of mind. anyways, two weeks of break has made me gained weight and caused me to feel super uber unfit. now and then, i like to think that it's all a stupid illusion and that i'll wake up to have a hot bod like jessica alba and be a champion athlete. okok...as i was saying, i'd like to dream. haha! yea...so now that rp biathlon's coming up on friday, i feel so screwed cos' i'm serious outta shape. nevertheless, i wanna and will bounce back into shape again :)

wednesday. we didn't have to meet in school for fyp today. right, so we were all supposingly to be working on our report already but i've been lazy and admit, i haven't started. all that diving during the weekend hasn't exactly gotten outta be yet. geezz...

blooping; diving at tioman during the weekends was a short getaway and it sure did me good as usual. though i got bitten all over by moquitoes, got scratched by a bloodly cat when i was trying to 'manja' it and fell on corals and got scratched till i bled because the woman in front of me was so darn slow and not confident at all when we were cave diving, everything was fun. i bought meself a new log book and happily helped myself to my instructor's stamps in which i placed all over my log pages and insisted that he signed them all for me. i am so going back for more blooping around again and go on a bikini high. i swear, go diving is like being legally allowed to parade around in your bikini and no one would care if you were fat and ugly. it's like a bloodly norm and you would be having so god damn much fun that you wouldn't have time to be self concious about your fats hanging all out. haha. really.

anyways, i met the best friend for 'mama mia' just now. it was awesome like the rest of the musicals that i've watched. i love musicals so who am i to judge huh?




xoxo JIN

music: secondhand serenade: fall for you

now, i don't wanna talk about how the competition went or about the day's happenings.
******

how do you, a simple human being of capabilities up to only a certain level, know if 'the one' is really the one? no, this wasn't something that had been taught in school nor is it something that one can google up a solution and find the specific correct answer. so now then, how do i know if you, are 'the one'?

mom said not to marry one who smokes, drinks or gambles. isn't that what every mother says? mom says i have to find one who has qualities similar to a housewife cos' i can't cook nor clean. but isn't that what guys want in their wife? one who cooks and cleans? so now then, how is another suppose to fall for one like me?

i've been in a fair share of relationships and it has become a game of nothing but pain, plain sheer hurt that leaves me demoralised and feeling so scared. each time i get into a game, i play hard and give my all. the truth is, it is never enough. yes, i have my many flaws but no one is perfect. i am young and i am still learning. how long, i won't know but least i know i am trying. but then one gets tired and one just wants to play for awhile and bask in sweet nothings.

so i listen to sad songs and love songs. so i like to lay in bed, getting lost in such songs that would create stories for me. in these stories, i would always be the lead actress and the world revolves around me. pathetic enough, these songs gets me going. i become hopeful all over again.

it's been awhile but why do memories of you keep coming back? no doubt, i love you still but you and i have moved on. i guess the love has change to a different kind, one in which i can't seem to explain. certain nights i wish i was still beside you in bed, feeling your arms around me and that familar smell of you. certain days i wish i was still lazing aound your house, renting dvds and watching them while lying on your lap and pigging out. and there are the times where i get angry for no reason and no warning about how it wasn't fair how we ended cos' we went through so much and i was the one who painted those pretty walls of yours with you. it's childish thoughts i know and it wouldn't be fair to still be thinking this way now, not when you have another and i too. but baby you made me felt so genuinely loved. everywhere seems to me, has a picture perfect moment with you. goodbye baby.

music: nicole richie: dandelion / britney spears: someday i will understand

in a few hours, it would be the heats for open water championships 2008. i'm starting to get the jitters. my aim would simply be to get into the finals. imma cross my fingers and pray real hard. when i wake tomorrow, i must have the will power to stay strong, physically and mentally. i want to and i will cos' i've waited so long for this day to come.




yesterday, i saw this couple which reminded me so much of her. days when we were together and i had thoughts of growing old with you. no doubt, i get the occasional pangs of i miss you and waves of sadness gush through me but oh well..what can i do now. move on already cos' you have.
i wish i could blow you away like a dandelion. away with all my worries and troubles. away with unhappiness in me. i wanna be truly happy and have someone hold me like no other for a long time. i don't wanna be broken time after time. i trusted and i still wish i could.

happenings during the hols.

3 fast weeks have gone by in a flash and so much has happened. i've enjoyed each and every moment and i thank all that have been part of it all :)

mind cafe! (tas, junlong and yvonne)this is yvonne. i know it's a damn retarded picture of her fulfilling her forfeit but yea, i had to put it up for the world to see. haha!ok, here's a more decent picture of her with me. this is junlong. this has got to be the most priceless picture of him and i so got it on camera! now here's yvonne disturbing junlong. what's new huhh.... this is tas the pervert angmoh. yvonne thinks that he dresses like a typical uncle. and yes, as much as he like sto disturb me, i get back at him pretty well too. we spent the day playing board games at mind cafe and then heading to bugis for dinner and neoprints! apparently tas says he likes taking neoprints. anyways, i can't wait for diving with ya'll :)

zoo! (rachel, chirstina and johann) my camera comes in real handy with the self timer mode.
thank you mr ice-cream man!
we had many failed attempts to take this shot. HAA!
this makes me wanna be in africa where i can sit a real jeep and be in the wild with the lions and elephants :D chris and ah ming were great pals.
rachel had to stand on the bench in order for this shot to be taken.
we were meant to be kids.and then rachel got her upper ear pierced while i had my nose pierced. i swear i was so scared that i was holding her hand so tightly it nearly turned purple.

japanese buffet! (rachel, marvin, yikai and andy) we ate like pigs. the guys were so useless cos' they kept putting up white flags and refused to eat rachel's and my remainder sushi.
rachel is so cunning. pretending to drop your sushi on the table isn't an excuse for not finishing up your food ok!
with andy around, you can expect things to be kinky.
ohh..we all loves peas...
couple wear; unplanned. see marvin's big fat smile. now we know what gets him really happy. ice-cream!
we is the ah lian gang~
fight fight fight!
with rachel around, i could laugh till my abs appear.
you see what i mean? with rachel around, there is never a quiet moment. andy likes to show off how much of a cleavage he actually has.
the auntie waitress so nice, took picture for us all. haha!

trainings! (open and still water) jonathan is sucha bitch to ruin our shot.
'the more we get together, together, together. the more we get together, the merrier we'll be.' nus and sentosa men showing some real muscles pulling up the boat.



now we know who don't eat their veggies...gary su!

hang outs with bestie! my favourite coffee outlet for the moment.

the holidays have been short but fruitful i must say. alot of catching up with friends and many trainings and attachments/coachings. not to mention the occasional working at the beach. so much has been done but there are way too many pictures to put up here so make do with whatever there is here :)

xoxo

i'm a happy girl because the holidays have been awesome-o and i loved every bit of it all!