until then, this is goodbye for good.

you know the kind of frustration when you realise that you've given a person one too many times to change and prove himself to you and still he's at that exact same spot? yea, that's how i've been feeling for awhile now. dear k, we were once lovers who become friends, but wait, let me correct that, we weren't exactly friends. how could we have been since you were never exactly there. you wanted me for the benefits, you wanted me when you were bored and lonely. damn right, you look like a wise good guy, but i do hope that the people around you one day see the true light. in your circle of friends, i've prolly always have been deemed as the slut, the bad and rotten one who brought nothing but misery to your life. so much for all that bullshit speech you gave me that night. really you lie like a bitch. i've been standing by you for as long as i've known you. i've been there all your nights out, i've been there when you needed a listening ear. did you try to let me in? hell no. you made me stay out all this time. i am utterly upset, very hurt. in fact so hurt that maybe i won't wanna see you ever again. until maybe hopefully one day, you've woken up and say the truth. i don't care if we never ever work out but the way you have been treating me all these years? i think i want an explanation, i deserve more than just a word of sorry.

i'm so angry hurt that i wanna break down and cry. that's how bad it is.