you know maybe ive never been moving on. maybe ive still been lingering at the back, hoping that somehow i'll get through all this, but really, i dont know how to. many a times i feel alright, i feel like i can get through every damn thing just by myself. but then, there are many a times as well where i feel so horrible, i feel i need a shoulder to cry on, arms to hold me and kisses to calm me.
i think i have almost lost control of what's going on in my life. ive got so much going on it feels like it's all gonna burst soon. im scared. i really am. im scared of growing up and facing challenges. im scared of failing in sch. im scared of being a nobody. im scared that im not being loved. im scared to move away from you. i think im holding on still, unknowingly. as im pouring all these out right now, i feel the tears building from within. i wanna break down and give up. for everyone who has known me, the have always seen the cheery side of me. ive never been the one to break down and away. but im a mess now. look at me now, i feel so empty.
as i try to fall asleep at night or as i gaze into nothing now, i pray a little prayer that i will get right soon. i wanna find my strength and be genuinely happy. i wish the pain away, i wish away the tears. i wish to let go.
1 comment:
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