i haven't blogged about my fabulous trip to darwin thinking that if i do so, it would be the final end of it all. stupid as it seems, i find it hard to pen it all down in words. no amount or kind of words can truly describe what i experienced in aussie. i'll get to doing it soon, i hope.

it's annoying how i'm afraid that i might just be falling back to my black hole again. i'm loosing focus, feeling very off track in terms of emotions. just about the only thing that perks me up and makes me feel happy and at ease is training. the other day i was out at sea paddling with some of the guys from team sg. it's been awhile and i still remember the first time i went out of the lagoon. the feeling was exactly the same, carefree. it was that easy to plaster a huge grin on my face. the waves took my worries away and i just didn't think of anything at all. i was in a moment and loving it again and again. we were just paddling, we were just talking and laughing. no thinking and worrying. time stood still and there we were, being captivated by mother nature.

i wish everyday was just like that. being simple and happy. no drama but just the sun, sand and sea. ahhhh...i wish i wish i was easy to read and you would know how i am feeling.