my favourite girl :)

samantha & i CAM-WHORING IN,OUT & DURING meetings.

music: bon jovi: thank you for loving me

ive been listening to slow, sad love songs over and over again.
yea, they always said that it would make you feel worst, but i beg to difer.
it brings back fond memories and most of all, it helps me cry it all out.

why'd you gotta be the one who makes me feel unpretty now?
im trying to do all the right things nowadays.
i swim it all out.
doing laps up and down the pool and flashbacks of memories still come to mind.
why babe?

i tell dexter that i find it hard to go to work.
why?
when i see my locker, i see you. the cute lil' care bear you made for me still remains. the pictures we took are still stuck to it too. I arranged them babe. I made them look pretty.
i dont wanna tell others how the fairytale ended.
it cuts like a knife and i tear.

i loved you.
did you see that right?
i wonder.

baby baby, do you know how i feel?

saved as southpark in my cell phone and in my heart.
funny how we met.

one thing i said i would never forget...
[ on the cell phone with you at plaza singapore.
k: where are you, i cant see you.
me: look up and you'll see me.]
you literally looked right up to the ceiling.
that got me rolling over with laughter.
babe, i remember.

i guess i hadn't understood at the beginning.
i guess i was protecting you in the wrong way.
you hadn't liked it, you hadn't seen the good of it all.
now it's all gone.
babe, i'll still remember.

i dont remember lying no more for i had treasured what we had.
why'd you have to loose faith in me.
i may never know.

no amount of heartfelt words will work on you no more.
not even if i fall down on my knees and cry.




why'd i have to get myself hurt again?
ive been putting on a mask.
that's what an actor does best. have i mastered that skill all too well?
today, i want to be alone under the stars. maybe the silent night can calm my nerves.

southpark no more.

RP's cheeringleading totally "rock".

POWER.
i heard about it from my friends.
and so i made an effort to lift my butt from the chair and comfort of my classroom to go to the agora at 1pm to catch the cheerleading performance.
i was DAMN excited LOR and i could hardly stay calm at all.
and at last i saw it with my OWN EYES.
there it was right before me...RP's very own JIGGLY PUFFS!!!...ooppss..i meant..erm...SEXIST, HOTTEST and not to mention COOLEST cheerleaders.
shucks! i hadn't brought my camera to school today if not i would have taken wonderful shots of the JIGGLY PUFFS.
HAHAHAHA!!!
it was really hilarious LA.
i mean they were so "YEA YEA...GO RP GO RP...(of course in their "squeakest and sweetest" voices.)
they were so "i am totally like those cool cheerleader in the states."
when of course, they were far from them. like totally.
anyway, i guess i have to give them credits also la.
after all, they were erm...NEW.
WELL DONE JIGGLY PUFFS!
I LIKE TOTALLY LOVE THE OUTFIT AND THE TUMMIES :))

after work on a sunday night.

while in the sentosa yellow line bus out to the departure centre, jeremy, binghui, gabby and i decided to have some fun. cam whoring always works. HAHAHA :)

my locker at work.

music: justin timerlake: losing my way

time check it says 2:02pm on my lappy.
the end of breakout two and the start of meeting three.
enterprise module and we have another facilitator today.
wow, she's wearing a pretty little elegant dress and carrying a LV tote bag baby!
not mentioning, she speaks with a slang and hmm...maybe it's impressive :)
anyway, alouis team is presenting now. the guy is speaking.
goodness xD

sam, paris and I were talking about going shopping soon one day.
i can hardly wait eh.

christmas is coming and tis' the season to be jolly!!!
i gotta get my wish list ready!!!
wwhhoooo...........

bikini high.

ive got myself a hot new red and white stripped bikini which apparently, my boyfriend isnt interested to see me in.

shheesshh :D

ive got nothing going my way.

rashes can itch, and so can it made you mad and fustrated.
ive been having a full body rash for three freaking days already, and it doesnt seem to want to heal. shheesshh...

anyway, lately ive been feelin vexed.
well, i suppose.
days when the world dont get you,
days when no one seems to be able to help you.
you just feel like grabbing your pillow and tearing it apart.
you want to mess your room and throw everything away from its place.
you want to scream and cry and hopefully have someone come hug you.
but you know you cant do it.
it wont happen.



"papa dont preach, im in trouble now.
papa dont preach, ive been losing sleep."

goodness gracious me.

cognitive module today.
goodness gracious me, the faci turned out to be yet another male guy who just couldnt seem to STOP asking questions!
like, what the hell man, couldnt he see that everyone was already restless?
and you know what is freaky?
whenever he asked a question, he would turn and look and sheena and i.
man were we freaked out.
and you know what was hilarious?
the way he drank his ribena!!!
he was slurping away like some guy who had never tasted such great ribena.
LOL.


anyway, i hesitated coming to school today.
I woke up feeling like crap and my tummy was hurting like no one's business.
i went to the toilet bowl and sat there for like what had seemed forever.
shheesshh...
i have no idea what i ate that crapped my morning.

i cabbed to school and guess what?
I slept most of the day away!
man did it felt good.
haha.

i was chatting with sam on msn while browsing through misso's blog during presentation.
HAHA.
i just couldnt concentrate.
teehee.

ohh, not to mention, i am blogging in class.
:D
meeting my bestie dawn later.
i can hardly wait.

ciao!

at the stroke of NOON.

i'm gonna go for swimming trails later.
i doubt i can make the timing.
oh goodness...

i'm eating "wan wan" cracker in class for lunch.
my diet sucks.
i wont be surprise if i die early.
ohh...i should just shut up.
haha.

you know, im aching and my body is freaking tense.
i can feel it man.
i should go for some freaking hella good massage.
it might just as well loosen me up.
maybe then will i be flexible.

by day, im engross and preoccupied in school.
not much thoughts of my sweetheart.

im bored in class la.
probably explains why im blogging.
no one to disturb.
even sam's not in school.
shheesshh...

had a long chat with grayson and dexter last night.
funny how love can change a person so much.
ive been thinking, people who have domestic partnerships all seem to be much happier.
casual remark.

oh yea, just to reconfirm that i am actually forgiven,
KEVIN KOO, I AM SORRY TO HAVE PLAYED YOU OUT ON YOUR BIRTHDAY.

teehee.
happy?

in a flirty mood?

you know how sometimes you feel confused?
hell yea, my heart is screwed and so is my brain.
goodness gracious.
i've got a dirty little secret and only i've got the key to it.

no comments.

i think i made someone angry today.
uh oh. :(
i'm like so sorry.
please don't ignore me.

music: stacie orrico: i'mnot missin' you

as much as i love you honey,
i gotta learn eh?

sigh, i dont wanna be like a burden to you.
right now, i may seem like an extra fustration,
right now i may seem like i dont understand,
right now i may seem like im not the one whom you can rely on for comfort,
but i hope you will realise one day.

i'll leave you alone to be busy.
i wont cry, i wont whine.
when you want me, i'll be there for now.

nothing in this world.

i've figured that I needed a distraction.
cam whoring ain't working.
mermaid just wants to play with her squeaky ball.
honey has no time for me.
no one's there.
sigh!

ok, i've got to find somethinge better than what i have now.











my big haired buddy, HADIF :)

burning sensation enough to kill.

check out my swollen eye.
i stayed home yesterday.
slept the day away with mermaid constantly coming up to me to i would suppose, to check on me?
haha :)




guess what?
i watched hi-5 and on kids central yesterday too!
teehee!
the kiddo in me.
*grins
anyway, i went to see the doc with mommy at night.
ive got antibiotics pills, cream and eye drops.
shheesshh...
i look like a pig.
oink oink!

trick or treat, happy halloween!

i woke up with a swollen left eye.
ouch!
i could hardly get outta bed.
and im not lying, i really had to drag myself out.
i cabbed to school because i was running late.

enterprise module.
we ended at like 1230 p.m.
cool, that was why i so insisted to go to school with my stupid eye buring.
i saw ending class early coming.
muahaha!

i was so eager to rush home and just head for bed, but guess what?
i headed for the dentist.
i had missed my last appointment which was like a zillion years ago.
so anyway, i headed for outram in hope of fixing my teeth with some other bright colour bands.
damn, but how was i to know that my freaking dentist wasn't in and the stupid nurse just refused to let me see another dentist.
screw it!
i came from woodlands mind you, do you know how freaking far that is huh??
shheeshh...and consideringthe fact that my eye was already felt like poping out and my nose was dripping like no one's business, I so wante to yell at the dumb nurse.

anyway, i skipped drama rehearsals today and also lifesaving training, where they had dry training which i suppose many would be slacking (opps!).
oh c'mon, i was unwell!
it was unintentional in other words.

so anyway, i got home around three plus to find my brother home with licia, his girlfriend.
i was slacking around instead of sleeping and then i decided that i should watch "the breakup" movie on my lappy.
with that, i had later went for a jog with mermaid and my shuffle.
it felt good, the night breeze.
well, it wasn't much of a breeze, considering the stupid haze.

wonderful eh...i was unwell but i could go for a jog.
wahahahaha!
i am so unpredictable.

i miss my sweetheart!

i heart you.

sugar sugar how'd you get so fly?

baby there's just something about you :)

i can see us holding hands, walking on the beach, our toes in the sand.

my <3

If I wrote you a symphony,
Just to say how much you mean to me (what would you do?)
If I told you you were beautiful
Would you date me on the regular (tell me, would you?)
Well, baby I've been around the world
But I ain't seen myself another girl (like you)
This ring here represents my heart
But there's just one thing I need from you (say "I do")


Yeah, because
I can see us holding hands
Walking on the beach, our toes in the sand
I can see us on the countryside
Sitting on the grass, laying side by side
You could be my baby, let me make you my lady
Girl, you amaze me
Ain't gotta do nothing crazy
See, all I want you to do is be my love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) Ain't another woman that can take your spot, my love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) Ain't another woman that can take your spot, my love


Now, if I wrote you a love note
And made you smile with every word I wrote (what would you do?)
Would that make you want to change your scene
And wanna be the one on my team (tell me, would you?)
See, what's the point of waiting anymore?
Cause girl I've never been more sure (that baby, it's you)
This ring here represents my heart
And everything that you've been waiting for (just say "I do")


Yeah, because
I can see us holding hands
Walking on the beach, our toes in the sand
I can see us on the countryside
Sitting on the grass, laying side by side
You could be my baby, let me make you my lady
Girl, you amaze me
Ain't gotta do nothing crazy
See, all I want you to do is be my love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) Ain't another woman that can take your spot, my love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) Ain't another woman that can take your spot, my love

Shorty, cool as a fan
On the new once again
But, still has fan from Peru to Japan
Listen baby, I don't wanna ruin your plan
If you got a man, try to lose him if you can
Cause the girls world wild through their hands up high
When they wanna come kick it wit a stand up guy
(Trust me) You don't really wanna let the chance go by
'cause you ain't been seen wit a man so fly
Baby friends so fly i can go fly
Private, cause I handle mine
T.I. they call me candle guy, simply because I am on fire
I hate to have to cancel my vacation so you can't deny
I'm patient, but I ain't gonna try
You don't come, I ain't gonna die
Hold up, what you mean, you can't go why?
Me and you boyfriend we ain't no tie
You say you wanna kick it when I ain't so high
Well, baby it's obvious that I ain't your guy
Ain't gon' lie, I feel your space
But forget your face, I swear I will
St. Barths, same bullet, anywhere I chill
Just bring wit me a pair, I will


Yeah, because
I can see us holding hands
Walking on the beach, our toes in the sand
I can see us on the countryside
Sitting on the grass, laying side by side
You could be my baby, let me make you my lady
Girl, you amaze me
Ain't gotta do nothing crazy
See, all I want you to do is be my love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) Ain't another woman that can take your spot, my love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) My love
(So don't give away) Ain't another woman that can take your spot, my love

and again.

i once said i wont let myself get hurt again.
oh well...i lied to myself.

here i am, putting so much into this already oh so fragile relationship and apparently, nothing seems to be working.
i guess im mad at myself for falling too deep.
you were once the sweet guy i so adored.
now you are the guy who constantly says he dont have time for me.
i get it, but cant you even treasure the times we have together?

im confuse.
i love you so but im getting so weak.
i simply have not a clue on what else to do but to cry.

i want so badly to get out of this misery.

and sam and darul said...

had science module in the library today.
first time i've had a class held outside of my classroom.
anyway, it was way more fun.
considering the cafe was just like a hundred steps away from where my class was sitting, you could imagine us walking up and down to get food and drinks like all the time.
anyway, we did biology today.
some genetic thingie which took me forever to understand.
my super sissy teacher was more of a burden than help.
he was blabbing away about having more self directed learning and class interaction.
the fact was that my class were all nice enough to try and pacify him by trying to live up to his never ending list of expectations just to get a freaking decent good grade.
but guess what, there he was, preaching about how we should be independent learners when he was in fact, the one going around lecturing us about what to do and what not to do.
ggeee....so much for trying so hard when you have one faci who is so narrow minded and simply love to cut into your speeches and disscussions.



so much for him.
so i was sitting down at my lappy in the library with my dear sam and darul while doing our rj.
while whining about the rj question (or rather it was just me), we had this conversation going on about getting high on alcohol.

sam says
"it's a damn shiok feeling, simply great"
"don't drink it fast and kill yourself"
"take your time to enjoy and blabber nonsense with your buddy"
"just go to bed when you can't take it any more"
"never have your cell phone anywhere near you when you are high"

and darul and i look on at sam.
and then we drifted on to hmmm...punishing girls by having sex??
apparently, sam was amazed by that idea.

sam says
"i like the way you put it"

darul and i simply laugh on.




sam thinks im violent.
shheessh...
so i said he should keep like what two feet away form each other but yea yea we never accomplished it.
haha.
can i help the way i am?

why'd you make me sad again.

sweet, you know how much i adore you.
i fell in love with a boy i once never noticed.
i cant bear to not see you even for a day.
i hate when you work away and dont have time for me.
my mind drifts babe.
i'm afraid to think too much.
not to mention that i get lonely and do weird stuff.
i dont wanna get use to this though.

had fun with baby :)

clubbing at DXO till 4 in the mornin'.
baby's friends.
his brother.
twang and misso.
dancing in the already jam packed crap space.
shhessh...
kinda like too little space, too much sweat and too little alocohol.

met geraldine there too.
it's kinda been like 'zillion' years since i last saw her.
kinda unexpected.
never really thought she would club.
teehee.
oh well...

let's dance the night away again babe :)

i hate you so.

"no matter what, my family is more important."



i was right to think of how much i meant to you.
you've changed within a month.
god is playing me.
i thought i found someone who loved me wholeheartly.
mistake after mistakes.
im so tired.

fuck love.

my boyfriend.

baby says i dont blog about him.
naahh...
see see, im blogging about you now.
teehee! xp

love love muchies <3

suddenly i see.

i bought a shuffle finally.
after losing my mini and nano, i decided to not waste mommy and daddy's cash and just buy my own shuffle.
it cost me $118.
so if it gets stole yet again, i wouldn't feel so heartbroken.
lol.

i've got a new hobby.
jogging with mermaid and trying hard in perfecting my freestyle strokes.
i wanna loose weight.

i've got new classmates.
they are rather fine.
my facilitator suck big time though.
confused and dumb in mny opinion.


i've been watching 'the devil wears prada' over and over again.
apparently, i ain't getting sick of it.

will i grow up to wear heels, chanel, prada and be a size four?
will i be beautiful?
will i be one of those slim girls who walk the runway and wear pretty little dresses?


it's one of those days when girl power kicks in and decides to settle down for awhile.
one of those days where a girl just feels confident and decides to let her hair down and have fun.
ohh yea...


i feel like getting high today.
i feel like having a drink or two.



suddenly i see - KT Tunstall
her face is a map of the world, is a map of the world.
you can see she's a beautiful girl, she's a beautiful girl.
and everything around her is a silver pool of light.
people who's around her feel the benefit of it.
it makes you count.
she'll hold you captivated in a path.

suddenly i see.
this is what i wanna be.
suddenly i see.
why the hell it means so much to me.
suddenly is see.
this is what i wanna be.
suddenly i see.
why the hell it means so much to me.

sixpence none the richer, kiss me

Kiss me out of the bearded barley
Nightly, beside the green, green grass
Swing, swing, swing the spinning step
You wear those shoes and I will wear that dress

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift up your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me

Kiss me down by the broken tree house
Swing me upon it's hanging tire
Bring, bring, bring your flowered hat
We'll take the trail marked on your father's map







"yea, and maybe, i've missed you too."

oh, bring to somewhere where the grass is green and the flowers are bright and pretty. where there's only me and you with the stars above us and the breeze in our hair. where there are no worries and i can cuddle up to you and smile with ease. maybe i'll dance. maybe i'll think that i am the luckiest girl because i have you sweets. oh, do kiss me again.

23rd of august, wednesday.

the last day of school for semester one.
the last day where W26G will be together.
the last day for teasing people like iLi, Phabhu, etc.
the last day where we can gossip about the same few people in class.

i love you all wallies.

i can't imagine life without you sweeties.

to all my wallies :)

i'm going to penang tonight.

lifesaving competition.

again.

take care while i'm gone.

bleah.

if anyone reads this.

teehee.

ciao!

thought.

i ain't missing you.
someone came along.

teehee :)

butterflies in my tummy.

tomorrow, open water championships.

i should be sleeping.
i really should.

i've got butterflies in my tummy.
i want that medal so badly.
i want to laugh at my RP coach so badly.
i want all my hardwork to be paid off.
i want the people around me to appreciate and be proud of me.
i want you.

tell me something i want to hear.
or maybe let me cry all my sorrows away.

let me do well.
let me win.

i once had someone to hold but i let it all slip away.
now, i am holding on to all that i have gained.

ciao people.

tomorrow, a day of competition.

thoughts, random.

how come everytime you come around,
my london london bridge wanna go down?

you ain't gonna have a shot with me no more.

on this day...

met up with jesse and jinyi.

he droved.

i met him first at j8.

we then picked jesse up and went to serangoon gardens for dinner.

ended up eating cafe cartel.

hmm...

it's been sometime eh.

i miss you so.

tsk tsk.

or maybe i miss your mommy's car.

i'm always in the front seat, never the back!

thanks mate for the erm...tampon casing from erm...america.

lol.





the last day i was seeing my cognitive facilitator.
she's gonna have to go bring her lovely baby girl into the world.
oh yea...that reminds me, ms serene's baby is so adorable!
princess ella as she is known to us is the sweetest thing.
pretty pretty pretty...

i like freking cried twice today.
sshheesshhh...
one was about mommy and i.
i don't wanna talk about it though.
i'm so sick.
then there was the bad news from uncle quek that two of my individual events (canoe and surfing race) had been cancelled because there could only be one person from one team in an event.
dammit.
i was so sad and was crying buckets!
my whole class knew what was wrong and Melvin, (the guy next class) was so sweet as to offered a listening ear.
gee..thanks mate!
anyway, screw SLSS.

"unpretty"

unpretty is when you see Jin quiet.
it's when you see her keep to herself.
it's when you see her straing into space.
it's when you see her smile and it all looks fake.
it's when she keeps talking about how upset she feels.
it's when she tells you how she will get over it.
unpretty is what she feels now and maybe for the other days to come.

quit speaking.

human minds work in a complicated manner.
dang.

have i been fooled?
or maybe it was for real.
like when it was last september.

he whom i once so adored.
he whom we had so much plans together.
ggeee...

will i feel like that again?
kim says "duhh!!! what?? you wanna be a nun???!!!"
tsk tsk.
that girl never fails to make me laugh.

and i never thought i would be sitting down lost in my own train of stupid relationships thoughts again.
this guy has got me.
sshheesshh...somebody get me outta here.

teehee.
and then i told kim, "i'm so tired of all this loving."

thoughts during math module

math class.
back to visual basics.
ssheesshh....
boohoo...

seven eleven's milo is yummy.
keeps me awake all the time.
haha.

listening to the radio.
breakout one.

reflecting on my used to be happier days.

mommy and daddy are breaking apart.
i aint sure if they love me and my brother.

oh, bro's outta the country.
USA.

i'm screwed.

mermaid's innocent.
her puppy eyes tells me she's confuse.
don't worry baby.
moomy's gonna love you a lifetime.

it's like a bomb ticking away.

i'm speechless and clueless.

i feel stupid.

i feel eager to soar and you are pulling me down.

gee...you were like anyone of them.

dedicated to you.

and i thought you were different.

why'd you have to make me feel unpretty?

don't go chasing waterfalls.

uniquely me.

or so i think.

not to others.

but just me.



i guess i've become so dumb after being in a long relationship.
i can't seem to see right from wrong anymore.
i've been naive and it's killing.

what do i want and what do i need?
i let a good boy go.
there is no turing back.

is it so hard to be in love?
yet it is easy to get cheated.

i might as well take a turn and back out of all this.
just do what i do best, drama.
smile for you all.

i'm happy, if you believe it.

don't tell me something you don't mean.

my image is ruin.
it has been for awhile and still is.
everyone wants only one thing outta me.

i don't wanna do this anymore.

good night and i'll be praying i don't crumble.

square face.

science class.
boring.
it's dragging on and on and on.
i'm pissed at my square headed teacher and it isn't getting any better!
she gave me a 'C' grade last week, claiming to the class that there have been complains that she has been given high grades.
yea right.
science is bad.
it makes me sleepy and it makes me mad.
i wanna be on the sunny island of sentosa.
i dont wanna be stuck in this big white and air conditioned school.
sigh!
get me outta here!!!
great...it's my team's turn to present.
see ya all peeps tonight.

ohh...look what i was doing during break.
childhood biscuits.
lol.
yea...lion lion..see...

NUS invitational competition 2006.

it was a blast even though there were no medals won. we had loads of fun cheering and screaming our lungs. we had all pushed ourselves to the maximum and by the end of the day everyone was shagged out.

last NUS training for the year?

ok. yesterday has got to be the worst training ever. i couldn't do anything right. sigh, it's days like this that really get me real down and crying on my knees. i tried and i tried and i tired. it hurts, my muscles ached, my fingers were burning and my legs were giving way. but i didn't wanna stop. i was nernous and i knew it. i was scare and i was hoping some magic would happen and i would be enlighten.

for the days to come, i'm gonna be praying.

let me have faith in myself.

fear creeping in.

i'm freaking. it's like only four days to nus invitational's competition and i'm really freaking. i'm afraid of losing. yikes! god, save me. have i slackened? sigh! i really hope not. anyway, i'll be pushing myself. i'll be bringing out the best in me. for my team and for myself. haha. oh yea. it's sad and strange to now be competing with people i once trained with. sigh once again. why is it this way? hmm...people from stingray, gosh, you dont know how much i miss you guys. i'm always busy. sometimes i question myself, when will i see you people again? will u look at me the same way you guys once did? perhaps things and people change. either way, i still love you peole the same way i always did.

i think all that's on my mine now is the competition. train train and more trainings. please let me have confidence in myself. please dont let my efforts go to waste. i wanna win and i wanna do well. is it too much that i am asking for?

hangin' on to all that i have to offer.

july 15

*republic polytechnic's over the wall production at the esplanade
*nus invitation at (erm...duhh) nus

august 6

*national lifesaving open waters championships at sentosa

august 27

*national lifesaving still waters competition




i've been busy. really busy. it's worst than being a dumb bee. my daily routine is waking up at 6am everyday from mondays to fridays and ending school at 4pm. oh no, my day doesn't end there. IGs are what takes up the rest of my time everyday after school. sigh! no social life, no personal space, no time for my mermaid and no time to cry over love. haha. yea ok, maybe i'm loving this busy lifestyle now, but then again, maybe i ain't lovin' it. if i ain't at lifesaving trainings, then you would find me at drama rehearsals.

i'm tired but still very determined. I want to achieve something. I want to be sastified with myself. I want each stroke and each pull to be perfect, I want each move and pitch in my voice to be flawless. So here I am, probably tiring myself out more than i think i would be able to take it.

maybe something's bugging me real bad. maybe i don't know what, therefore, i'm making myself so busy to avoid it.

how far am i to loving you, sweet?
or rather how far are you to loving me?

come home baby.

dad lost mermaid last night.
omg.
i was freaking shock
he said she ran out of the lift suddenly when the doors were closing.

i've been wondering why did she run away?
i mean ive let her off the lesh before.
ive also gotten so pissed with her that i left her downstairs and went back upstairs.
she never ran away...until now.
sigh.
ive been searching for my baby.

mermaid means the world to me.
maybe i love her more than my family.
sig.
i dont know
she's still a puppy and it was raining last night.
gosh!
come home sweetie.
mommy's getting really worried.
i need to hug and kiss you.

curling up to die.

singlehood gives you freedom of all sorts.
but when you want a steady someone to hold you and be there just for you to wipe your tears away and to kiss you and shower you with love, you just lack it.
i wish that someone will walk by again.
as much as i want to remain single at the moment, i still wish that i have someone by me to tell me he loves me.
im screwed and i know it.
my thoughts are a mess.
come my way, i can wait.

ive flooded mysel with all sorts of activities. im pack everyday. ive tire myself to the extend that the flu bug has gotten me.

heaven knows what will come next.

here i am in class on a tuesday morning at 1039am and my enterprise teacher is talking about the world cup.
haha.
that's like the "in" thing now yea? x)
i had liked mr prem, and now i think im lovin' him.
haha.
as in his classes are fun and lively.
*grins.
update later.
class started.

yours truly,

maybe people only see one side of me.
maybe people wouldnt wanna see the other side of me.
i write blog entries, but do people really read and understand them?
i doubt so.
so why do i bother?
i wonder......

so you had a bad day...

school's starting once again tomorrow.
what could be worst, i wonder...


"i promise you, from the bottom of my heart, i will love you till death do us part.
i promise you, as a lover and a friend, i will love you like i never love again with everything i am."


please come my way soon, my mind's a mess and my gazes are all wrong.


i fought with my family again. im beginning to wonder where was the love and warmth i once felt gone to in this family. my bother hates me as much as i hate him now. i cant believe he can threaten to tell everyone what he knows about me. what's wrong with him. think about it when one is mad, one shouts and can get violent. it's normal right? it isnt like he is oh so perfect too. he goes weird and insane when he's made. like he's some perfectionist. i cant believe how much a person can change when they are mad. there he goes bitching about me again...i hate this family...or so i think...


ive discovered the more emotional side of me today. i need someone to be there for me again. i dont wanna cry through this alone no more. sigh.